Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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