just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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