Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
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