i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
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dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
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If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.