All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
