Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize