She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
