i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
