sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
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he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
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Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
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