Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
