I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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