somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year