About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
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he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
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Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
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