i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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