It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
