TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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