Where are you?
In a non slutty way
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
