If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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