I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
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