did you get engaged???
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
