I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
