you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
