I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
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