adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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