If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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