Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
