i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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