I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Can you bring me the toilet please
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
