I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize