you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
