someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I just forgot I was standing up.
Randomize
