Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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