I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
honey bunches of taint.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize