i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize