He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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