1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
