The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
