Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
