You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize