i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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