threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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