So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?