we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
