Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
