So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize