Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Randomize