Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
