I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
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Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
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He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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