it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Randomize
