He asked to "fluff my boner.."
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
she told me i tasted like america
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
