if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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